Amity Park, City of Headaches
by Pseudinymous
Summary: Maddie and Jack Fenton's goals were noble enough; to make the city of Amity Park totally ghost proof, possibly forever. Well, that was the aim, anyway. The result was about as far from that as possible; the entire city wound up contracting ghost powers, instead...
1. You Are Not Alone

**The Obligatory Author's Note:  
**Man, this was amusing to write. Since I can't live on rewrites my whole life and I had a perfectly good (and vaguely ridiculous) idea, I've decided to type this up, instead.

This is more like a prologue chapter. The chapters after this, if I'm right, will average out at about 3,000 words each. Anyhow, shall we?

**The Obligatory Blanket Disclaimer:  
**Don't own anything. Well, I own my computer, and my bed, and my light, and my gaming consoles... yeah, I'll stop now.

* * *

**Amity Park, City of Headaches  
**A fanfic by Pseudinymous

**~ 1 ~**  
_- You Are Not Alone -_

* * *

"I'm telling you Jack, it _won't work_."

Hah! Where had he heard that before? Oh yes, back during the Proto-Portal incident. Maybe during that incident with the Fenton Disinfector, too. Oh, and how could anyone forget about putting the on button on the _inside_ of the Fenton Portal...?

Admittedly, Jack Fenton had heard those exact words come from his wife quite a bit, really, and she was always right. But this wasn't a day that they were present – in fact, Maddie was grinning as she turned one of the final screws, the pride beaming and radiating from her face. Nothing had made either of the pair happier than this project. After all, it was their best invention yet.

As the couple tinkered away inside their far-from sterile, vaguely glowing basement, their teenage daughter wandered down to check up on what they were doing. She promptly stopped, and then she stared.

"... What exactly _is _that atrocity?"

"Really, Jazz?" asked Maddie, slyly. "You wouldn't want us to give away the big surprise, would you?"

The eldest Fenton sibling ran her eyes over the monster of a machine; it hadn't been nearly this big just a few days ago, but now that all the parts had been put together it seemed to take over at least half the basement. Obviously, they weren't planning on taking it outside – fitting it through any sort of door would have posed great problems, even in the machine's unassembled form – which meant that, just maybe, it had something to do with the portal.

Would it be too much for Jazz to hope that the result of this invention would be _good_?

"You know... actually, I kind of wish you _would _give it away."

Jack beamed at his daughter, but still gave her a devious look. "You'll find out soon, Jazzie-Pants."

Jazz glared. She really did wish her father would stop calling her that, but decided it was better to ignore the remark. "But what if it's important that I know what it does?" she asked, honestly. "What if it backfires?"

"It won't backfire." said Maddie, firmly. The sureness of her opinion permeated throughout her voice and her now-crossed arms, which was usually a better sign when it came to their more hazardous inventions. "We've tested all the individual parts, we've done all the calculations, and we've had quite a few people from quite a few reputable sources check everything. There's nothing to be worried about, sweetie."

... Which meant nothing when it came down to Danny.

On cue, Jazz's brother stumbled uncoordinatedly down the basement stairs, only almost spilling the lemonade he was holding. Jazz watched him carefully as he boggled at the now-assembled monster of a machine, and then tried not to gape at the people who were responsible for its creation.

"What's it do?" he asked, flatly.

"Oh, Danny, dear!" Maddie cried, throwing her arms into the air. She also totally ignored any and every expression on her son's face, and went on to exclaim, "We're so excited! But we're keeping this one a surprise."

"But I don't _want _you to keep it a surprise." said Danny, warily. Then, he repeated a little more forcefully, "What's it do?"

Both parents grinned. Jazz was very tempted to facepalm herself, but her brother didn't have nearly as much ability to hold himself back.

"Well, when are you turning it on?" Jazz inquired. "You can at least tell us that."

"Sometime this afternoon!" Jack exclaimed, still grinning and bursting with pride.

Danny took a moment to slap himself on the face a few more times and then immediately began heading in the opposite direction, back up the stairs. "Have fun testing that while _I'm _not here." He mumbled. "I'll be at Sam's!"

"Oh no you won't! You'll be down here with us to witness it's grand unveiling!" Jack called after him.

"No I won't!" Danny shouted back.

Jazz made no attempt to stop her little brother on his quest to get as far away as possible from something that could potentially kill him, and instead stepped down and tried to take an interest in her parents' bizarre work. "So, now that he's not home..." she attempted, almost managing an inspired look. "What does it _really _do?"

Maddie simply laughed. Jack joined in too, but not until he finally figured out what the joke was.

* * *

Contrary to testing out his newest invention, Jack had spent the afternoon trying to look for his troublesome son. Danny was certainly _not _at Sam's, where he'd said he'd be – although Jack had noticed quite a high ectoplasmic signature within their house and quickly offered to cleanse it for them, much to the Manson family's dismay. They really did _try _to say no.

The next top was Tucker's. Jack offered to check their house for any sort of signatures while he was there, but was quickly shooed off by Tucker's father. He seemed so convinced of their current safety that he laughed at Jack and stated that, even if a ghost did show up, it would probably be rendered paralysed with delight from the cookies his wife was baking. That joke sealed his fate; with cookies in the house, Jack would have analysed it for ectoplasmic signatures even if he was told not to at gunpoint.

The only signature that showed up around their house, however, was coming from inside the Fenton Family Ghost Assault Vehicle. That was good; it meant he'd definitely caught the spook that was inhabiting the Manson's house. Typical mansion ghost, Jack thought. Although, didn't they usually go for the more abandoned types of buildings?

It didn't matter. Jack didn't know where Danny had disappeared to, and was probably at this point deliberately trying to avoid him. His son would just have to miss out on the first test. Jack thought it was sad that the boy didn't take more of an interest in their inventions (Jack never for one moment considered the idea that both his children might have been scared half to death of them), but he could always come back home later tonight and see it working its magic.

Jazz grimaced when her father arrived home, but was pleased to see that Danny was nowhere to be found – that meant he'd be well out of harm's way. Jack emptied the Fenton Weasel into the portal, shut its doors, and turned his attention to his wife.

"It's time, Mads."

"Indeed it is." She replied, ushering a very nervous Jazz down the concrete steps of the basement. "You know what, sweetie? This is going to be _revolutionary_. We'll be the heroes of Amity Park."

"Yeah, I'm sure you will..." Jazz winced. There was nothing she could do to stop inspiration like this; if her mother didn't turn it on, her father certainly would. So she stood there and waited, bracing herself for the worst.

Maddie made a final check for any contaminants, and gave it the okay. Then, Jack held up his hands and declared, "Let's start this baby up!"

The whining sound that both ghost hunters were so fond of was present in this invention, just like many of their others. Jazz took a few steps backwards; there were engines inside those machines that were being worked hard enough to make the floor rumble, and strange flashing lights blinking a terrifically ominous green from within the piping work.

Maddie and Jack Fenton continued to grin.

The vibrations in the floor began working their way up walls, and Jazz's nerve promptly committed suicide. She didn't _want _to see what this machine ultimately did, especially not with the Emergency Op Centre making those awful creaking sounds on the roof. The red-haired girl scrambled with all her might up the thundering basement stairs, through the creaking and cracking ground floor, and burst out the front door.

That was all she got to do. A wave of something that felt highly unpleasant and vaguely electric crashed into her back, and she collapsed to the pavement.

Eventually, the rest of Amity Park collapsed with her.

* * *

_Thud. Thud. Thud._

Maddie opened her eyes, slowly. Something wasn't right – in fact, she could tell instinctively that something was extremely _wrong_. Her heart had migrated to a place midway up her throat and, on top of that, she'd acquired possibly the most atrocious headache known to man.

_Thud. Thud. Thud._

Why was there ectoplasm everywhere? Granted, the lab always had its somewhat glowing stains, but now it'd become effectively radioactive... well, maybe not quite that bad, but the bright glowing greens certainly gave it that sort of an effect. And what was that infernal thudding? Was it her heart?

_Thud! Thud! Thud!_

... That wasn't the hammering of the vital organ; it was too tinny. No, Maddie now determined it to be completely separate. With an amount of difficulty she turned to face the source of the noise, which seemed to be the doors of the ghost portal. Someone... no, _something _was knocking on the back of that steel, trying to get out into the human world. Well, Maddie couldn't have that! Whatever it was could knock all day; she certainly wasn't going to let it through after turning on the Fenton Destabiliser!

"_HELP!_" screeched something behind the portal doors.

Maddie recognised that voice. That was her _son_!

Everything reversed; she had to get him out of there, _stuff _the fact that her body didn't seem to be obeying the commands that were given to it! She was going to make the stupid sluggish thing move whether it liked it or not! The son of a ghost hunter falling prey to a filthy ectoplasmic creature_ just_ _wasn't on_. Ever.

The mother was determined. So determined, in fact, that she managed to completely miss the point that her body was glowing, and that a crucial component of the Fenton Destabiliser was lying under a pile of other odds and ends, never having been attached to the machine in the first place. Maddie slammed the generic lock on the Fenton Portal, and her son – if there was such a thing as a graceful way to do it – overbalanced and fell out flat on the floor.

"Hi..." mumbled Danny, who did not even attempt to move from the nose-crushing position until he saw his mother's foot in his peripheral vision.

No, that couldn't be right... was she _glowing_?

Danny rolled onto his back and looked straight up into Maddie's goggled eyes, and screamed.


	2. Complexities

**The Obligatory Author's Note:  
**Just so you know, I wrote Vlad's part while listening to the theme "Jack Sparrow" from Pirates of the Caribbean 2. If you listen to it, you'll know why. :P Also, sorry about the lateness. As usual. T.T I'll try to start being a good fanfiction writer from now on and actually update my stuff…

* * *

**Amity Park, City of Headaches**  
A fanfic by Pseudinymous

**~ 2 ~**  
- _Complexities_ -

* * *

Maddie looked down upon her son, neck arching over as she reached down to offer him a hand. Apparently this wasn't one of the best courses of action; Danny screamed at her, rolled away and backed himself onto one of the laboratory benches, leaning backwards over it with bulging eyes. He'd never given her a reaction like _this_. It must have been the Ghost Zone…

"It's okay!" Maddie urged, trying her best to be comforting through that horrible, splitting headache. "You're out of there safe and sound, and I'm here. You don't need to be scared, sweetie."

Danny had other ideas, however, and those other ideas very much included how frightening his mother's echoed voice and glowing exterior was. Warily, his eyes slid over to the unconscious form of his father, who also shone brightly in such a darkened room. Danny tried to think about what he should say or what he could do, but cognitive functions had apparently been tossed out the metaphorical window, causing him to sputter out only the words that were wrong.

"Mum… you, both of you, you're ghosts!"

The hunter looked at her child as though he were stupid. "Danny, don't be silly," she chuckled, grinning slightly. "I'm fine, I just have a bit of a headache, that's all!"

All Danny could do was shake his head. Maddie looked from him to her own body slowly, gaining the steady realisation that she was indeed something quite different from what she was before. For a moment she felt as though beside herself - and in the active process of taking even more steps away - because this was by far the most shocking event she'd ever had to come to terms with. This was, in short, _insane._

Under regular circumstances Maddie had always been the calm, collected one. But now, her marbles seemed to be doing cycles 'round her head and threatening to roll straight out of her ears. There was no denying any part of this; Danny was right. If the glowing skin told her anything, it was that _she_, a ghost hunter of all people, was a _ghost_.

"It just isn't possible…" Maddie mumbled, her voice wavering. She began to stagger over to one of the laboratory basins, looking endlessly into the mirror above. Seeing the colour-inversed exterior of her jumpsuit wasn't enough, however; she removed the hood and her goggles, allowing them to settle at the base of her neck. A pair of glowing green eyes stared straight back.

Danny couldn't say anything – he was speechless and could only watch. Here was Maddie Fenton, his mother, going through the painstaking process of trying to pick up mundane, physical and notably _harmless _objects, and failing dismally nearly every single time. Her hands would simply become intangible as if mocking her about her own condition, and were apparently quite attached to the idea of fading away of their own accord. This, of course, did nothing for Maddie's ailing mental tact.

"This isn't me!" She sobbed, shaking her head. "No, it's not! I don't care what's happened, this – this isn't right!"

"… What's not right?"

The echoed voice almost came out of nowhere, causing Maddie to whip around to see her husband picking himself out of some of the wasted machinery. As Jack dusted himself off, he seemed dazed – even happily so, although his face was still showing a small amount of concern. Oh, how Maddie envied him right now. To be cautious but so calm…

"How _haven't _you noticed yet?" Maddie asked, incredulously holding out an intangible hand for examination. "_Look at us_!"

"Well…" said Jack, carefully. "Actually, I did notice. But it's kind of not so wrong as much as right, considering what we forgot…"

"We _forgot _something?!" Maddie demanded. "What, Jack?! What could we have _possibly _have forgotten that could result in – aghr! _This_!"

All Jack did was point over at some of the wrecked machinery, one specific part in particular that seemed to be quite a lot more _pristine _than the rest of it. That was, in fact, because it had never been attached to the main section of the machine in the first place. In order to make it easy to move around and work on throughout the house, the ghost hunters had made each segment to be both portable and easy to disassemble, which had ultimately led to a disaster occurring from what was otherwise a very logical innovation. All they'd forgotten was a small part, easy to overlook. But it was also one of the most important bits.

Danny took his eyes off his parents for a few moments, making the time to amble over to that very piece of equipment. But getting anywhere near it seemed to have a repelling effect upon his ghost half, so he quickly retracted a curious hand and made a pact never to touch it.

Maddie, on the other hand, looked at the thing with horror. "The rejection system…" she whimpered, descending into holding her head in her one tangible hand. "But the absence of that alone couldn't have… done this. And the force of the explosion wasn't enough to kill us, either!"

The strangest thing about this situation, Danny thought, was that his ghost sense had never even attempted to go off. He didn't feel that familiar chill at all around his parents, a non-reaction reserved exclusively for Vlad and Danni. Half ghosts, like himself… it was a shot so long that it sailed quite a way over the horizon, and it put his own secret in serious danger. But these were his parents, and his mother at least was _seriously _freaking out. It was the only decent thing to do.

"Mum, dad…" Danny stammered, trying to stay as collected as possible. "I don't think you've been killed."

For the second time that day, the mother looked at her son as though he were silly, but the determined look on his face made her withdraw and listen. He'd always seemed to know a lot more about ghosts than he ever let on, after all.

"I mean, you mustn't be… there's no body! You're still _you_, both of you!"

Jack was about to laugh, however stopped and thought about it. "But… that would be like saying our bodies got riddled with ghost energy, and that shouldn't happen. A human just isn't meant to accept that sort of thing, but… you're saying that it can?"

"Well… maybe, yeah." Danny shrugged, a hand finding its familiar nervous place behind his neck. "Why not?"

"Because it isn't possible, that's why not." Maddie shot back, but then she stopped in her tracks. "But, but… if it could, then maybe it'd be possible to-"

That was all it needed; a trigger. Danny had known this for years and if it was indeed possible, all he needed to do was provide the suggestion. A much more _human-_looking Maddie now stood before him, herself seeming to debate whether to use stunned, shocked or awed as her current primary expression. Danny grinned, relief evident, as Jack too discovered that trigger on his own.

… But that didn't solve a much more _pressing _problem. Both his parents were half-ghost. Danny had never imagined in his entire _life _something like this happening; how was he supposed to even begin to deal with it? How was-

"There's nothing that would have limited the field…" Maddie realised, the skin on her face paling. "I… don't know how far it could have reached…"

No one said anything – the nervous air in the room was thicker than custard. Maddie blinked, then shook her head as she stalked through the wreckage, gazing hesitantly at where she felt things should be and where they actually _were_. They really had made a mess of this, hadn't they? Even though she was glad for the relief, the headache wasn't helping her mood or her spirits.

"My brain feels like it's about to explode, Jack." She complained, cutting through the silence and holding her head with the hand that seemed to remain the most tangible during her 'little episode'. "Do you think it's got something to do with-?"

"Probably, my head's not that great either." Jack grunted back, closing his eyes and proceeding to sit back down on the cold laboratory floor. "Danny, give your old man a hand and bring some aspirin down here."

"But won't your biology be different?" Danny asked, playing dumb as much as he dared at this point.

The Fenton parents glared. "Just do it!" They shot back in unison. Danny nodded numbly, and traipsed up the stairs.

The boy had to face it; he was utterly lost in this situation. All he could do was follow his parents' commands and watch as the disaster laid itself out in front of him, and he just _knew _it wasn't going to get better as it went further in. Further cementing of this opinion occurred when, as he reached for the medicine cabinet, his bewildered sister stumbled into the kitchen.

"… Danny?" she mumbled, holding her head in much the same manner their parents had held theirs. "Oh my God, are you all right?!"

"I'm fine!" said Danny quickly, still scrambling for painkillers in amongst the strange varieties of concoctions Maddie kept in the Fenton Medicine Cabinet. "What about you, mum and dad are-"

"I know."

"You what?"

"I _know_, Danny!" Jazz exalted, suddenly and uncharacteristically terrified. "It's the whole town! _Everyone's_ got ghost powers! Worse still, I think I'm one of the only ones who's figured out we can even change back to human!"

"You mean there's basically a whole _city _loose with confused, terrified ghosts?!"

"That's exactly what I mean!"

By this point Jazz discovered that she'd allowed her arms up in a mark of exclamation, something of which she immediately became self-aware and quickly desisted. She really _was _trying to regain some of that ailing mental composure. "Well," she said, "What are you going to do?"

"You're asking me to _do _something? About _this_?!" Danny exclaimed. "It's mum and dad's invention, and I don't have any idea about how it works! I can't even make myself non-ghost… let alone the rest of the town."

"Yes, but!" Jazz rallied, losing composure once more. "… Someone has to do something… worthwhile."

It was only at that moment that Danny realised her eyes were quite a lot redder and puffier than they normally were. He didn't hold it to his sister, however; he simply retrieved the required medication, wordlessly passed a capsule to Jazz and slipped back into the basement, leaving her to her own devices.

"They have to fix it…" Jazz tried not to sob, pouring herself a glass of water and quickly downing it with the pill. "Because I'm not like everyone else…"

* * *

Within Amity Park lay the dwelling of its mayor, the great and powerful (and not to mention obscenely rich) Vladimir Masters. He was a half ghost on the move, with business of both legitimate and dubious natures to attend to. "Kill Jack" was always last on his list of important things to do (despite the assertions of _some_ particular annoyances), so he usually didn't quite get to it. Today, however, looked like it might be the day he had time to sneak into that old fool's house and-

_BLAM_.

Vlad blinked stupidly, before falling two metres upwards into the ceiling with a smash. The _ceiling_.

From his new viewpoint, Vlad stared down at the floor. He felt gravitationally drawn to the sky, which out of all the things he'd encountered as a half-ghost super-villain was quite by far the strangest. He soon discovered that while he could still fly, his body had seemingly decided to take upon its own gravitational field that refused to be anything but the wrong way up.

Feeling slightly electrified and more than a bit scrambled, Vlad lowered (heightened?) himself to the floor and returned to his familiar human form, waiting for gravity to reassert itself. He was instead greeted with his face slamming into the ceiling, quickly followed by the rest of his body.

"Well then." He mumbled, looking up at the floor but not yet attempting to stand. "This isn't right."

Vlad looked around for a moment, hoping dearly not to find any startled human witnesses attracted by his cry of fright. Indeed, no such person was there to see, although Maddie the cat had apparently just lifted from the carpet and began to screech as she dangled sideways in mid-air. Somewhere along the lines she'd begun to glow and gained red eyes that glowed so brightly that they were in contest with Plasmius's, something Vlad could only stare at in shock.

Meanwhile, Maddie continued to screech and flail.

He sat on the roof for a minute or two longer, contemplating his situation. _Something _was at the bottom of this, and unless he went and decided to do some rigorous investigating, he didn't like his chances of ever being the right way up ever again. If someone had been messing with Desiree, this was probably the stupidest, most bizarre wish ever conceived. But an _electrical wave_?

Vlad wasn't a genius – actually, he kind of was – but Desiree's wishes had never been brought on like that.

"I guess I'll have to look around the Ghost Zone…" Vlad sighed, changing back to his ghostly self and springing from the roof. He gave Maddie a reassuring pat, to which she screeched, and flew off into his basement.

Or, at least he made a _darned good effort_ at doing so. For the second time that day, Vlad's face came into direct speeding contact with what was very notably a _solid_ surface, the shock of which stopped him from flying and sent him falling (or rising) straight back into the ceiling. _Again_.

_I can't become intangible._

The thought rang through Vlad's mind like a broken record, continually chiming its incandescent little message. In horror, he attempted invisibility, ecto-blasts and shields, even duplication. _Nothing worked anymore_. Nothing but flying and apparently being gravitationally attracted to the bloody _sky_. He was the _mayor_ of a whole damned _city_. This! Wouldn't! Do!

… But neither would moving through areas filled with servants while, you know, casually walking upside-down on the roof. Even if it was his only real option left…

So he walked through the door, precariously.

"Mr Masters!" shrieked one of the servants who, along with her co-workers, collectively glowed like a chandelier above Vlad's head. "Did it get you too?!"

"Yes, something like that." Vlad spat irritably, as he traipsed about in as orderly a fashion as possible along the roof. "I see that it's affected everyone – even the _cat's_ been turned into a ghost."

"Maddie?!" gasped one of the chubbier maids, the one who he'd always remembered to be very fond of cats. Vlad just nodded and kept on walking.

"The lot of you should tend to her. I'm going to be investigating the root cause of the problem, and it's not something I wish to do with people – dead or alive – watching over my back. Is this clear?"

"So you're saying we're dead?"

"Maybe. Something like that." Repeated Vlad, with a wave of his hand. "I believe I just asked you all to tend to the cat, however."

Not another word was directed at Vlad, but there was a lot of confused whispering – things like "Is he really a ghost too?" and "If he wasn't, then how could he be walking on the roof?" He ignored that – he never answered the maids unless they spoke to him directly, which in this case was a great relief. It meant he wasn't socially obligated to give any sort of tangible answer.

Either way, what troubled Vlad the most was the issue he encountered when he got to the front door. A very big problem presented itself, something he'd only just realised; he could no longer exist outside without being in his ghost form… unless he wanted to float off into the sky, never to be seen again. All he wanted to do was check things out to see if this strange phenomenon had affected just his premises or whether the extent was much further, but that was out. It was almost as if this energy wave had been specifically designed to make his life more difficult.

Well, at least the outdoors wasn't his main destination. That still lay within the depths of the Ghost Zone, where without all his powers he might just be torn apart. Still, he didn't have to let anyone _know _that he'd been rendered essentially defenceless, he just had to keep up his demeanour, and try to gather information in the more docile, laid-back areas of that demonic wasteland…

… And then Vlad came to a highly fundamental, extremely problematic _problem._

There was a very good reason he called his lab a _secret _lab. Other than being secret, he'd constructed it so that it was impossible to get into aside from becoming intangible and sinking through the floor in a very specific room of his mansion. You couldn't breathe air in it and at this point Vlad couldn't even remember whether he had, in his ghost form, reverted to needing to do that petty chore.

In short, the only way to get down there now was with help. And that wasn't the way Vlad rolled, because he rather liked his secrets secret. The only other option would be the Fenton's portal, which was always on and always accessible. This still meant he'd need to fly there, however – as the _Wisconsin Ghost _– without any access to intangibility or invisibility.

_Fun_ came to mind. Barrels of the stuff.

With a sigh, Vlad checked his watch, had a look around the room to make sure it was clear, and transformed. Finally he leapt from the roof, and as he exited his own mansion he had to supress every urge and nerve in his system to avoid flying upside-down.

After all, an evil fruit-loop of a man needs to continue maintaining his dignity, even if his sanity had travelled quite a ways over the rainbow.

As he flew out over Amity Park, however, he soon realised that everyone else was already a little too worried about losing their _own _minds, rather than worrying about an at-the-moment-harmless super-villain flying gracelessly through the city. And, Vlad had to admit that, in all his life… he'd really never seen anything quite like it.


End file.
